As I enter "young old age," I surely need and crave God's reassurance. I have no appetite for the fast lane.~Journal entry on my 70th birthday
Over the last decade, I've had an intermittent dream. It probably emerges in the night watches when I'm feeling stressed or afraid. In the dream I'm speeding, not completely in control of the car, at times almost veering out of my lane into traffic, my heartbeat racing. I always wake up before I crash, thoroughly relieved that I'm not actually driving, my hands gripping the steering wheel, white-knuckled.
Last week I had this same dream, yet this time there was an intervention as I swerved and careened down the highway. A giant-sized man came and stood over my car, bent down and placed his hands on the sides of the vehicle, almost like that intimate gesture of tenderly cupping a face. My car had a moon roof. I peered up through the square opening and met the man's soulful gaze, his eyes hazel, glistening. His cheeks were covered with a dark, neatly trimmed beard, his skin brown. I could almost sense his kindness emanating through the steel doors that he held in his palms. I felt deeply grateful that he had slowed my pace, steadied me.
I sense this dream was reassurance from the Lord, that this transition to another season is not to be lived in fear or life-draining anxiety. He desires for me an unfaltering and equally ardent pace. The Lord's stride is my map, His ways my destination, His peace my compass, His presence my safety. For now and as I continue forward, I will keep looking to Him. Only He can assuage the losses that arise in this life. Only He can fill my cup with the sweetness of His joy. Attune my heart to His mercy and contentment.The highway is scented by the fragrance of His wisdom, His understanding and affection. His laughter and acceptance. He freely gives all of who He is. There is rest on every side of His Holy presence. There is no better road. Grace to it!
March on, my soul; be strong!~From Deborah's song, Judges 5:21