My sister and I had a long satisfying conversation about things spiritual. What we were learning. "You should tell the story of the Zion Maidens on your blog," she said.
Years I've spent not fully liking myself. A bent toward people pleasing and clamoring after being loved, approved of and wanted by others. An age-old longing. God's love really the only panacea. Couldn't I get it? Don't I get it? It's taken decades.
These last months I've gotten much more skilled in receiving that divine advance of love toward me. I've surrendered to the tenderness. I feel as if I've climbed a mountain. I would name the mountain MT. IDENTITY. There's a piece of me that believes the climb is merely a mirage--that there are more and higher peaks truly impossible for me to scale. That I must somehow prove something. But there's a greater part of me that knows I've arrived. I'm at that destination of I AM THE BELOVED. That's my truth. There are no more peaks for me to summit. I've got this one. My territory is here. I've put down my flag at this place. I believe that I am the beloved of God. All of my truest identity flows from this admission. It doesn't matter that I have issues of self-doubt, passivity and lack of faith at times. All that matters is that God sees me as His, approves of me, affirms me, His affection assured, no matter my weakness, no matter my circumstances.
Then I did something I don't do often. I asked for a confirmation from God. Assurance that I was on the right track. That I wasn't merely operating in magical thinking. I turned to I Peter 2:6 in the Passion Translation.
Look! I lay a cornerstone in Zion, a chosen and priceless stone! And whoever believes in Him will certainly not be disappointed. As believers you know His great worth--indeed, His preciousness is imparted to you.
Then in the footnote:
Mount Zion was once a Jebusite stronghold conquered by David who made it the capital for his kingdom. This is inside the walls of present-day Jerusalem. Zion is used in both the Old and New Testaments as more than a location. Zion is referred to as the place of God's dwelling. God's people are called Zion Maidens. Zion is the heavenly realm where God is manifest.
So, this my assurance as the beloved. His preciousness imparted to me. A Zion Maiden, no less.
Thank you for bearing with me in my process. Perhaps in some small way, my struggle to anchor down into the love of God will support you in your process whatever that may be. Please know how much I appreciate your connection. Your readership. Thank you for your comments and validation. Now may the God of all grace shelter you, keep you and assure you of His great love for you. God's peace in your hearts.